After learning some startling things recently about our government, I drafted and mailed the following letter. I will keep you posted regarding any response.
Federal Bureau of Investigations (FBI)
Attention: FOI/PA Request
Record/Information Dissemination Section
170 Marcel Drive
Winchester, VA 22602-4843
Dear Sir or Madam:
My name is Kenneth Snipps and I need your help.
It has come to my attention that every American has a “file” kept about them by the FBI. My neighbor Mr. Biggs said that the file you have on me says I am a “loser” and have webbed feet.
Do you really think I am a loser?
Would it be possible to see my folder so I can know what else you think about me?
And just so you know, I have started a file on you, and it says I think you are mean. But I wrote it in pencil and should be able to erase it if turns out my file says lots of nice things.
Please write back soon because this ordeal has given me agita and I am out of antacids. But you probably already know that.
Thank you for reading and responding to my letter.
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